It is the responsibility of the researcher to obtain any copyright clearances. Permission to publish material from this/these transcript(s) must be obtained from the Supervisor of Reference Services and/or the L. Tom Perry Special Collection Coordinating Committee. [Notes added by transcribers are in square brackets. Dashes in square brackets indicate unclear words or letters. indicate words the author inserted to a previously written line.] MSS 4205 – H. B. Colton Letter Number of Pages: 5 ----- new page (MSS4205_p001.jpg) [text rotated counterclockwise on left side of page] P.S. 2nd one of our Belles is to be married next week, & her dress, trimmed with Houston Lace costs $240.00 The Ladies of course are on the “qui vive” to see it. I am sure a girl with such a dress must make a good wife. [text written above body of letter, continuing postscript] The bride is about 5 feet 8, & her great probably put $40 extra on the dress. I cannot tell any thing about the general style of the dress, or the size of the hoops. I suppose, however, they imported a whale expressly for the occasion. Oh holy Moses! What are we coming to! Next century it will take the “Great Eastern” to carry a single lady with her “fixings.” And yet we shall all love you as much as ever, because after all you are better than we. Indianapolis. Nov. 12. 1857 Ever Dear Friend: I have wished for ever so long To find both the time and spirits to write to you a long, full-hearted letter; althought I knew I should get no answer, and my message would be like “the voice of one crying in the wilderness,” without even a responsive echo. But this is too bad and unreasonable; and I do not see why you could not gratify me by writing me something as kindly & delightfully as you talk. I cannot imagine why pleasant words & cordially wishes, if “pen-&-inked,” should be any more delicate or dangerous, than if coming to the happy ear through parted lips. here I am, in a population still strange to me, with scarce one sympathising friend, and no intimate and dear companion in the whole city. For although I soon became acquainted with most of the leading gentlemen and ladies of the town, and from many of them met with the most cordial reception, yet a want of leisure, and latterly ----- new page (MSS4205_p002.jpg) the absence both of means & spirits, have prevented me from mingling in their balls, parties, fairs, drives & pic-nics. Some of them are clever & agreeable persons, and there is an especially intelligent & companionable set of gentlemen here, as is natural from its being the great centre & gathering=point of the whole state. But I have neither the time nor the money to indulge freely in their sociabilities & sports. This, to a person naturally so social & liberal as I think I am, would be very annoying, did I not also possess a native fund of life and self dependence, which enable me to entertain myself, with my own thoughts & daily business. For the girls and married ladies, I have some dear friends among them who are very kind; but I see very little of them, and with some of them I must be fast fading out of mind, as I sometimes fear I am with you. Besides, none of them are like you, nor do I know of any girl any where so good & pleasant, nor of any married lady so sweet & charming as your sister. The only family in town that at all resembles yours in warm manners and lavish hospitality, consists of persons, who though kind & cordial to a fault, are yet not bright & interesting. So that they are like only by halves. There is here another family from Pennsylvania, with whom we are very intimate, and who are of remarkabl worth & brightness. The girl, in particular, knows every thing, and flashes & sparkles, like a diamond. But they are too severe, fastid= =ious & critical to suit me entirely. There is also a young married lady here, who has I think a face of the most mournful sweetness I ever looked upon. But she has no sister or brothers with her; her husband is recluse & silent; her health is very feeble; consumption has seized her with its fatal fangs; and, like all that is sweetest & fairest, she will soon go down into the breathless darkness of the grave. I seldom see her, & when I do, my heart aches painfully.— Well– take it all in all, & especially since my brother failed so sadly in his business, my life is sufficiently dismal – or rather it is a state ----- new page (MSS4205_p003.jpg) of monotonous indifference. Luckily for me, when this Rail Road, like most others throughout the country, became so embarrassed that they had to reduce the number as well as pay of officers so many duties were devolved on me that I have been almost all the while too busy to know whether I was happy or not. Since last winter I have on a moderate calcu= =lations missed half of my dinners and three– –fourths of my suppers, and usually, on returning home, have usually gone at once to bed, to sleep off weariness and perhaps vexation. I have not been out of town one minute in six months, although I have free passes over all Roads from Maine to Kansas. Sundays I commonly spend in doing up the writing left over from the week, & Sunday evening is all I have to myself for any social purpose, except that I sometimes tear an evening out of my employments perforce, to accompany Laura & Gedia somewhere, and the next day atone for it by writing dinnerless & supperless all day. But such constant absorption hinders me from having time to mope or fret and the only grief is that it is existence, not life. I hear sermons & read books as a little as a horse does, and have no chance to be either religious or intelligent. I hope I shall be forgiven for not being a pattern (or patent) Christian; for I really have not the time. If I had not learned a little something in former days, which I have not yet totally forgotten, I should expect soon to be taken up & taken care of as a hopeless idiot. ----- new page (MSS4205_p004.jpg) Perhaps, however, I should be elected mayor, sent to Congress, or appointed to a foreign Embassy – for such is now-a-days the fate of the biggest & most predestined fools. – By the by I, (I beg a thousand pardons of monsieur De La Place, who, I hope, has ere this taken another wife to his bosom to console him for the one who has gone to "Father Abraham's") I should have said, "Empassant," what have you poor weak-kneed, broken-backed sham Republicans in N. Y. been doing this Autumn? I am ashamed of you all, and out of pure disgust I have a good mind to turn Mormon. I would, too, If I could only choose the Queen of the Harem, who should sit up in state, do just as she chose, never be touched with any thing rougher than the tenderest of kisses, and for whom all the rest (mere wives in name, but servants in fact) should do all menial offices, wash, cook, mend, sew, run of errands, fan the mosquitoes off, do up the scolding, which is needful in all households, and whip the — Never mind. They wouldn't need whipping. There's a picture for you, drawn by the hand of an artist – a charcoal artist on a shingle! ----- new page (MSS4205_p005.jpg) But, dear Kate, dearest of all my friends, past present & to come, dropping all the rigmarole of nonsense into which I so characterestically diverged on the last page, you will find on the previous four pages a vivid description of the "unenlivened" condition I am in. I cannot visit Lockport for some months yet, although I so desire to see you again, and also to have some cheerful intercourse with others of the good old town. Meanwhile I say you ought to write me a pleasant letter, which would be as good to me as a ship from California, for which also I keep looking, & it comes not. Ask your mother. She'll tell you to write at once. If you will not, have Alice do it, while you attend to the children. My love to her, and tell her I should not care any thing of her if I did not think her as good as she is handsome. I understand she is now living with you. It must in many respects be a great satisfaction to you all. Respects to Monsieur Austin, who I understand is now a gallant Cavalier, I saw an account of the gallant appearance his Corps made in Buffalo – being the best in that part of the State. I think, however, by all accounts that it must have been a very hazardous Campaign – mud, water, colds & fevers being a more deadly foe than "Injuns" or even the "cussed Red-Cuts." I hope nobody was "shot in the neck," or had to struggle, mouth open, with that horrid enemy – a "Tartar"-Emetic. Even now, in my mind's eye, I see them charging upon the Troops of "Turkey," and offering up to the grim gods of battle whole hecatonchs (or demijohns? I always forget military terms) of "Amsterdam" & "Jamaica"! Anon I see the heroes rise refreshed, and march again to miscellaneous slaughter. But a truce to nonsense. Austin Knows me too well to suppose I mean to "poke fun," at his Company, which I understand by their drill & general appearance deserved great credit. But I sometimes cannot help making a jest. It often relieves an aching head & a heavy heart. I hope your father is well & prosperous in all things. Give him my regards & tell him the Republicans of Niagara cannot afford to quarrel with those of Genesee about little sectional matters. It is of evil omen, portending defeat hereafter. ----- new page (MSS4205_p006.jpg) My warm love to your kind & excellent mother. I trust her health is tolerable. I occasionally hear that you are near the "Promised Land"; and then again I hear, perhaps not. I hope you are if you wish it; if not, I hope not. That same "promised land" seems to grow a mixed crop of roses & thistles, grapes & crab apples; although I fancy it is the best country yet discovered, although requiring very careful husbandry. If you see Mrs. Chauncey Keek, the Murrays, &c please give them my kind remembrances. If you do not write me, do send me a newspaper, or something to show that you have not forgotten me. If you see Isaac send me your love by him. Do you hear? The writing of this rambling letter is quite a pleasure to me, as for a wonder by hardwork last week I have procured myself a little partial respite this week. It is very healthy here: the city improving rapidly, & times though hard, less dreadful then at the East. and now God bless your warm heart & handsome face, and keep you from forgetting your absent friends, among whom you cannot have a better one than I. Miss Kate Spalding } Good bye Lockport } H. B. Colton P. S. Respects to Charles, I will write again ere long to some of you, if I can find leisure.